Summertime and Scraped Knees

Living in Southern Alberta, we take every possible moment when the wind isn't howling, the sun is shining and the temperature isn't frigid to spend outdoors. I have two little girls who finish up breakfast and are promptly asking the play outside for the remainder of the day.

My girls are 3.5 and 1.5 years old. If you have toddlers you know that this age means bumps and bruises. Whether they're moving too fast and run into something or trip over their own feet, I feel like someone is always picking themselves up off the floor. I've learned rather quickly that my superpower is to heal "owies" with a single kiss (and occasionally with the help of a Doc McStuffins band-aid).

Being outside with my girls brings all sorts of new accidents to be had. From something as simple as walking to pick up the mail to something as complex as climbing on the playground, the risk of injury is never ending. We've officially entered scraped knee season and currently both girls have scabs on various body parts.

There are certainly times when I'm over cautious,
"don't run on the sidewalk."
"Don't climb up there."
"Stay close."
"Hold my hand."
The maternal protector in me comes out in full force. But I'm learning about balance; about letting my daughters explore and learn their own physical boundaries. While I often cringe watching my youngest run after her sister, envisioning her falling and getting road rash on her chin, there's something so beautiful about watching that sense of independence unfold before your own eyes.

As we're experiencing that transition from "baby to toddler" and "toddler to preschooler," I'm learning to trust my mothering instincts even more. The A-Type, controlling, perfectionist is me is being set aside as the proud mom watches her children grow up and discover the world and their place in it.

Motherhood is such a fine balancing act and I feel that as my daughters are growing, so am I. As they discover new abilities (and speeds!), I'm discovering the fine line between fear and faith in parenting. I have no doubt we'll be buying boxes upon boxes of Doc McStuffins band-aids this summer. I'm also confident knowing that the three of us will grow immensely into exactly who we're supposed to be. As I've been watching my flowers flourish I think it's fair to say that we've been flourishing, too.

Who You Are Vs What You Do

Ok, we did it! My oldest is potty trained. At 3.5 years old and after many battle of the wills, she decided she was ready and that was that. To say that I didn't beat myself up on a regular basis over my child who is quite intelligent not being potty trained would be an understatement.  It was a daily battle not feeling like a failure every time I changed a Pull-Up.

Unfortunately, social media was no help. "Potty Train in 3 Days," let me tell you, I tried every trick, bribe, method and timing in the book. And, although I have some amazing mom's in my life who continually encouraged me, reminding me that her not using the potty isn't a direct reflection on my parenting, there were a few (whom I sincerely hope unintentionally) weren't so kind in their comments or looks.

What I learned through the potty training process with my daughter is that ultimately what matters most is who you are, not what you do. This is something my husband and I strive to teach and model for our children, that their character is far more important then their skill set. There have been countless times that my toddler's character shone through and made more proud than any poop or pee on a potty could.

The same goes for you, at the end of the day, many won't care or remember what you can do, but they will remember how you made them feel. Do you look someone in the eyes and actually listen to what they're saying? Are you generous, more than fiscally, with your time, your words, your actions? Are you kind? Are you patient?

There is definitely a time and a place to let you skill set shine and I believe we've been gifted with talents for a purpose; but perhaps we put too much emphasis on the talent sometimes? In the parenting world we love to show off our offsprings latest learned skill, ensuring they're reaching those crucial milestones. And yes, milestones should be celebrated and new skills practiced, as should the budding character of our wee ones.

If you're feeling pressed down and like you don't measure up because of something as trivial as potty training, let me remind you that who you are far outshines what you do and in the end it always will.

"You're doing a good job."

Recently I was out for dinner with my two daughters. As per usual my children were friendly & smiley towards those seated around us, including the table with a family that had two older girls. Following our meal, on the way out of the restaurant, the mom of the family with the daughters stopped me. She asked the ages of my children (3 & 1), commented on how busy I must be (in a knowing sort of way) & then complimented their behaviour throughout the meal.

The exchange of that evening got me thinking about how I interact with other parents, whether I know them or not. We’ve all been there, someone starts melting down in the middle of the store & everyone is all eyes. Some give the sympathetic look, portraying complete understanding of the situation. Others are judgemental, usually as they’ve never been in that situation themselves. Occasionally a passerby will offer the words, “this too shall pass.” But still there the desperate parent is, struggling to keep it together & help their child get it together.

The thing that stuck out to me about my interaction with the fellow girl mom following our mealtime out, was that she didn’t offer me some cliche phrase to make me feel guilty about not savouring these hectic, busy baby & toddler years, rather encouraged my children & more directly my parenting.

I can totally appreciate the sentiment of the phrase, “this too shall pass.” Parents of adult children never fail to let you know that “before you know it they’re grown,” & any parent knows this all too well. I mean, hello, where has the last year gone? Just like that I’m on the cusp of full on toddlerhood with my second child! The days may be long, but the years are certainly, very short. And although that short phrase, “this too shall pass,” is intended to offer some sort of hope, it still leaves a parent feeling desperate & in the moment, often like a failure.

I know that in those crazy moments when the sh*t is hitting the fan & meltdown mode is in full swing, it’s like a car crash; it’s so bad that you want to look away, but you just can’t. Imagine if rather than giving that awkward, knowing smile, or offering some cliche that offers little to no hope in that precise moment, if we simply said, “you’re doing a good job.”

I’ll be honest, I’m my own worst critic when it comes to parenting. There are countless times when I beat myself up as I drift to sleep about situations that I could have handled better, been more patient, spoke more softly, been more kind, been more engaged… What I need more than anything from those who have been there isn’t unsolicited advice (social media offers enough of that, thank you very much), or a catchphrase to make me feel guilty. What I need is someone who’s been there to identify that I am in fact doing the best that I can given the circumstances.

So the next time I witness a meltdown in the grocery store, knowing the self condemnation that accompanies your child losing it, I’ll be the first offer the phrase, “you’re doing a good job,” because really, aren’t we all just hungry for validation? Parenthood is hard enough on it’s own with sleepless nights, endless laundry, mealtime mishaps & feeding struggles, playtime struggles, the witching hour, chaotic bath & bedtimes, potty training, explosive poos, meltdown moments, figuring out childcare etc. etc. etc. What we really need from other parents is a cheer squad. Unless asked, I won’t offer advice, just encouragement. 

Goodness knows we all need.

Back at it.

It’s been awhile, a very long while. So much has changed and yet, so little. 

So, what’s changed? My baby girl is now a toddler. A crazy 3 year old, with most amazing vocabulary and entertaining personality. She’s always up for fun and a giggle, she’s friendly and outgoing, she knows what she wants and I’m certain one day this will be a trait I greatly admire in her, although at times it makes me want to scream.

There is however still a baby girl in my life. A sweet little one year old, who is full of smiles and spunk. She’s a quiet the observer and then quickly surprises you with her go-getter attitude. Did I mention she’s sweet? She truly is, the sweetest little thing and she’s been like that from the moment she joined our wee family.

Our world is busier and much more pink, but then it’s always been busy and always very pink. I’m still at this stay-at-home mom thing. Working on not beating myself up over the little things and celebrating the little (& the BIG!) things. Have you ever noticed how it’s easier to beat ourself up than to celebrate our wins, no matter how big? Here’s a win, I’ve finished cups of coffee lately before they’ve gone cold. I won’t get into my dismal feelings of failure…not today at least. I’m sure there’s great pieces of wisdom to be shared, I’m just still working through the process of not picking myself apart too badly. Thankfully His mercies are new every morning and perhaps after nap times, too?

We’ve grown and experienced and been stretched & challenged & here we are still standing. I’m still holding hands with the most amazing man I know. He’s forever wowing us with how he loves, protects, provides, encourages and supports us. Through every season we’ve faced we’ve somehow come through stronger and more committed than before. 

It’s the fall, a new season. Although September is not even close to beginning of the year, in my mind it’s always been the beginning. Perhaps because after our little summer hiatus from everything from actives to favourite TV shows, it’s all starting up again. Or perhaps it’s because in my former career everything seemed to kick start after the summer and I’m stuck in that mode. Regardless, I’m happy for this fall, I’m feeling rooted and ready for all that’s headed our way.

Musings From a Mom of Girls

Hello my name is Catherine & I am a girly girl. I’ve always been a fan of coordinated outfits including shoes & jewelry. I’m a lover of all things glittered & sparkly (much to my husbands dismay when it’s time to decorate for Christmas & it looks as though our house as been invaded by fairies). I love shopping, fresh flowers & high heels. For the one year I played soccer my mom said other parents on the sidelines asked if I was a dancer because of how I would run down the field. I love all things pretty.

It should come as no surprise that I am delighted to mother two beautiful little girls. So far (the youngest is still a bit young to know for sure) they are just like their mother! My 3 year old loves princesses, sparkles, dress up, shopping & pink. I love that over my daughters’ lifetimes we will get to share all sorts of fabulous experiences together; ear piercings, first makeovers, pedicures, shopping trips, late night tears & giggles.

I realize there is a chance that one or both of my girls may not be into the same girly things that I am & I am 100% ok with that. Growing up, my little sister & I were not completely on the same page in terms of a lot of our interests & yet we still developed a close & strong relationship; which is ultimately what I care about most. No matter what, I want my children to know that they are loved & valued regardless of what their interest may be.

I’m also not so naive to think that raising girls won’t have it’s unique challenges, but I like to feel I’m up to the challenge. Being an incredibly emotional female myself (yes, I’m the one who cries in commercials & gets teary at weddings & baby dedications), I feel as though I may have a certain advantage to when it comes to emotional teenage girls. And sass, sweetheart, I’ve got that one covered. I distinctly remember the last time I was grounded as a teenager being because I was “being a bitch.” 

Consider this blog my random musings of being a mom to girls. The high highs & the low lows, God knows my life is full of them!

Daddy's Girl

My baby girl loves her daddy. I'm sure for some parents it's difficult when their child picks a favourite. I've read in numerous books & magazines how to handle possible feelings of rejection when you come in second place. Personally, I love it! I can't begin to describe how my heart reacts when I see the two most important people in my life together!

I will never forget watching my husband first fall in love with our girl as he held her in his arms at the hospital. After an emergency cesarean, he was lucky enough to give her her first cuddles & kisses. I've been told that when he said her name as she was being examined by doctors & nurses she immediately turned towards his voice. He has always been equally as effective with calming, soothing & putting her to sleep as I have been (unless she's hungry). Although bath times started rocky for our wee one who hated being naked (until only recently!), they've always been special times for the two of them as upon bringing our little one home daddy assumed the bathing baby role. 

After 13 months of enjoying our precious daughter on the outside, there are no words to describe how amazing it feels to watch her start to share affection with us! My heart has melted as I've watched the man I married, gracefully & confidently step into fatherhood. My heart now bursts as I watch my girl fall in love with the man who will for years to come be the most important male in her life. 

One of her favourite words to say is "dad," & she's so delighted to hear her dad call back to her. When she hears the door open when he returns home from a day at work, her face lights up & she immediately makes her way to his warm embrace. When the three of us are together she often favours being with her daddy. 

How could I possibly be jealous of their sweet relationship? It is so incredibly special to watch the daddy/daughter relationship blossom & grow. I also know that it's quite unique & different from my relationship with her. 

To the dad's out there, know that those moments early on make a difference. As tough as it can be with the screams & cries with a newborn, you're building an amazing foundation for a strong relationship as you head into life with a toddler. Learning your baby's preferences & little quirks not only help your partner out when everyone's tired, but it helps you bond with your baby from the get-go. 

For the moms, don't take the favouritism too personally. Enjoy watching the special unique bond form between your man & baby. Relish in the fact that there's someone who loves & cares for that little person as much as you do! What a blessed child to receive that much love & affection from both parents. 

How could I possibly be jealous of a relationship that I could never fulfill? What an incredible example my girl is getting at a very young age of unconditional love from her daddy. May she know that her Daddy loves her even more (I can't even imagine that's possible, but I know that it is!) than the both of us combined. 

Family is a sweet blessing that I pray my baby girl will always have, know, & be confident of. 

Dreary Days

Grey days are the best for hanging with my baby girl, enjoying excessive cuddles & warm beverages. The wet weather today called for a lunch date at the Calgary Farmer's Market with a lovely friend/family member, & her peanut, followed by Starbucks drive-thru for the drive home in the rain. Scrumptious food, gorgeous company, one of my favourite places to spend a few hours, drinks that warm from the inside out & special moments with my baby; it was an all around perfect day.

Grey, pink & sparkly make for a fabulous colour palette. Not only was my darling baby dressed in those colours today, but those are exactly the colours I'd use to describe the day. Grey for weather, pink & sparkly for the fabulous, glamorous girls I was privileged to spend the day with.

Everyday we have a choice to make; we can be tossed to a fro, or we can take control of the atmosphere.

Here's to making every grey day at the very least a little bit sparkly.

It's December already!?!

My sweet baby girl is napping, I'm sipping on my gingerbread latter (decaf, half sweet, soy, with no whip, of course), the fireplace is going & all the thoughts rolling around in my head have finally screamed loud enough that I'm jotting them down.

This past year has flown by. It was just one year ago that we made the move to our new home near Calgary (Chestermere if you want to get technical), Alberta. So much has happened since then! My other half was on the road quite a bit for work, while I set up our house before Christmas.We found out we were expecting our first baby just before celebrating Christmas with my beloved inlaws. I took a contract position in the Alberta Cancer Foundation Event Office for a few months in the spring. We bought & sold a few vehicles, trailers, boats. I had the opportunity to speak a handful of times. We took some holidays. Before we knew it August arrived with the birth of our firstborn. Since then we've found our groove as a family of three. A few short trips have been made. We've had a babysitter. We've introduced our sweet girl to some nearest & dearest, including her three great grandparents, two of which passed away shortly after meeting her.

This past year has turned out to be an exceptional one, not without its own trials & triumphs. As I've been enjoying everyday with my baby girl the nagging desire to write just won't go away. "Write a book" has forever been on my bucket list. What that looks like, I have yet to know.

Motherhood is the greatest thing I've ever done. The smiles, coos, giggles & cuddles make me feel like the most important person on the planet. Milestones are being met & at nearly four months it's impossible to imagine my life without the beautiful soul I get to call daughter.

Our house is decorated for Christmas, though I must admit its a modified version. My meters upon meters of garland are still tucked away this year. It was as if December totally snuck up on us& before we knew it our annual decorating day had passed & our bins full of winters decor were still being stored. In fact, I must admit, we toyed with the idea of not decorating at all this year, considering our families are out of town. I'm happy we changed our minds though, even if it took me three evenings to make it happen.

I'm excited for my baby girl's first Christmas season! I realize the chances of her remembering much are slim, but I can't help but be overjoyed by the season of wonder she currently finds herself in. She could careless about the decorations, the beautiful sparkly tree or any presents, but this, this is when lifelong memories & deep traditions are birthed. For the first time ever Christmas will be hosted in my home, rather then my parents or inlaws & for that I'm ecstatic! What will Christmas look like under my roof? A gorgeous mix of Dempsey & Furukawa traditions, mixed with a few new rituals which will become familiar & comfortable for our family of three & any guests who join us in glorious celebration.

This advent season I've been preparing myself by working through "She Reads Truth: Emmanuel." I love my times of solitude (which sometimes include holding a sleeping baby). Although this time of year is often described as busy & stressful, I'm experiencing something so sacred in the preparation. In the past I've found myself helping a congregation prepare for this blessed season & have overlooked doing an adequate job of preparing myself. I'm feeling so refreshed as opposed to worn out as December 25 draws near; my soul cries out, "oh come Emmanuel."

Yes, oh come Emmanuel.

90 birthday candles

My amazing maternal grandmother turned 90 today. My mom's sisters decided to throw her a come & go tea, aka birthday party, this past weekend. Those of us who are blessed enough to be in the same family as her know her resilience & love first hand, as a result it was no surprise to see the many guests attend her party & honour her on this admirable milestone.

If you've ever met my grandma, you know what a shock it is to think that she's 90 years old; not only is she in remarkable physical condition, she has maintained a sharp mind & quick wit. I'm thankful for the influence she's had in my life over the years & for the incredible genetics that she's passed onto her daughters & grandchildren.

My grandma is someone I respect more then I can clearly articulate. She's been a constant source of support as I've travelled the a couple of contents, started a career, gotten married & experienced all sorts of twists & turns. She's someone who displaces unconditional love unlike anyone I've ever met.

In honour of my incredible grandma I wrote the following to share at her party:

Grandma, for 26 of your 90 years I've had the honour & privilege of being your granddaughter; this has brought great responsibility to my life. A responsibility to be a loving, supportive wife. A responsibility to keep my heart & arms open towards my family, as I display unconditional love. A responsibility to be a kind & faithful friend. A responsibility to care for the physical, emotional & spiritual needs if those who enter my home. And finally a responsibility to care for myself, as being in your shape at 90 is something I aspire to. Thank you for being the ultimate role model, it's my great delight to build upon your legacy. I love you.

Among the many blessings in my life that I'm thankful for, my grandma is certainly one of them. It was such a privilege to be able to celebrate this milestone with her. I'm forever grateful to be her granddaughter.

So long, farewell

After years of having to say goodbye, you think I’d be good at it, or at least comfortable with it.  The truth is, I’m not.  As I face the end of yet another chapter in my life, I find myself in a bit of denial as I know that all too soon I’ll be saying those two words laced with tears.  I suppose it’s a good thing when one stays “soft,” at least that’s what I’m telling myself.

Reflecting back there are certain goodbyes I distinctively remember.
I’ve had to say goodbye to my parents & siblings as I’ve left the continent, unsure if I’d ever return to call Canada “home.”
I said goodbye to my best friend/boyfriend (now husband), as I went to the opposite end of the world just days after we started dating.
I’ve said goodbye to friends from around the globe, not knowing when, where, or if our paths will ever cross again.
I’ve said final goodbyes to two grandparents who graduated to heaven.
My husband & I have said goodbye countless times as he or I have left the other for days at a time to take work trips.
I’ve said goodbye to besties who have relocated.
Each of these goodbye has been significant & painful in its own way.

Despite these various situations of having to say goodbye to some of my nearest & dearest, I have a feeling the round of goodbyes coming up could quite possibly be one of the most painful.  In just over a week I will be saying goodbye to my church family as my husband & I continue the crazy adventure we’ve on together.  I’m aware that people leave churches all the time, be it because of discontent, unresolved issues, or relocation; what we’re about to do is nothing out of the norm.  However, I’d like to suggest that our departure will indeed be one of great sadness as we are in fact leaving on a good note, yet a difficult one.  I’ve been on staff at our church for over 5 years…  5 of the most difficult, wonderful & stretching years of my life.  I’ve grown in countless ways & learned that there’s a lot that wasn’t actually taught to me in Bible College, that or perhaps I was just to naïve to take notice of that which would prepare me for real life ministry.  We’ve gone through rough patches, as well as some good.  Numerous times the thought crossed my mind to leave earlier, yet I always felt that the timing just wasn’t right & now there’s peace as my notice has been given & my final day is in sight.

Our church has not only been my place of employment, but it’s also become a second family to us.  We’ve created relationships with young & old that have made an eternal impact on our lives.  We’re so thankful for the laughs, tears, coffees, lunches, dinners, desserts & fun we’ve had the opportunity to share with those have accepted & loved us.  We've both grown & matured in countless ways. We've been empowered & released to do what God has called us to in ministry & in our everyday lives.

I know that more goodbyes will come my way over the years.  I also know that this isn’t a final goodbye, as I’m certain we’ll visit this “home” of ours often.  When we encounter those who are a part of this family we’ve grown with, our interactions will not be awkward or unfriendly, rather we’ll embrace with warmth & fondness.  Not only are we moving on with a blessing, we will leave one as we go & although you'll hear goodbyes from our mouths, in our hearts we'll really be saying "see you soon."

I was evacuated.

There's nothing like an evacuation to put life into perspective. Thankfully I was home from work as the small town I live in was being evacuated. Frantically I went through our home of three years gathering what would be needed in the event that our house ended up in flames.

While gathering important papers, passports & photos I began to get a greater perspective on what's truly of value. I'm so thankful that my parents were able to come assist me. My mom helped me get a handle on what's irreplaceable as she began packing up pieces from my husband's grandma & china pieces that have been passed down through generations, plus precious quilts handmade by my maternal grandma.

Leaving my home gave me a new understanding of what it would feel like to live in a developing nation. As I looked ahead & saw nothing but a steady stream of traffic & in my rear view mirrors just as many vehicles following. Imagining what it would be like to be making that trek away from my home on foot brought all sorts of emotions to the surface. I could not have been more thankful to have a vehicle to assist with my quick evacuation; my Jeep, is something that I so often take for granted & yet after a day like yesterday, I was so appreciative of the four wheels that transported me to safety.

My mom & I headed out of town at the same time, while my dad was a bit behind as he went to rescue our trailer. The only thing is that he wasn't just "a bit" behind, we didn't see him for more then five hours. Did I mention he didn't have a cell phone on him? What was supposed to be a quick trip, ended up being an evening full of praying & fried nerves. Turns out my dad was stuck in traffic, thankfully that's all that had happened.

Although I had our family heirlooms, all important documents & our wedding photos, I realize that the most important thing in my life, isn't a thing. The most important thing in my life is without a doubt the relationships I have with my nearest & dearest. I know that that sounds incredibly cliche, but it couldn't be more true after the past 24 hours I've experienced.

Last night I was incredibly displaced with only a suitcase that I threw a few clothing items in (no shoes I might add, shocking, I know!), a laundry basket with items wrapped in tea towels & a backseat full of important papers & photos. To be honest, I'm still emotionally raw. I could not be more thankful for the many men & women who have worked so hard to keep homes & lives safe. I could not be more thankful to my incredible brother-in-law who was out digging trenches, one of the many unsung heros of Southern Alberta; someone who certainly never signed up to fight fires.

Finally my heart is bursting at the seams that my family is safe. Words can't even begin to describe how thankful & grateful I am at the moment. The words "His mercies are new every morning," have never felt more true in my life then they did today.

About my mom & family

With Mother's Day having just passed, I've been quite reflective the past little while about how incredible my mom is.  Those closest to her & who know her well, know that her life has certainly had it's share of difficult situations & yet, she is strong & could easily be defined as an overcomer.  My mom is beautiful to the core & her beauty from within radiates outwards.  Her identity is defined not by what she does, rather by who she is & by who has created her.  She is without a doubt supportive, encouraging, passionate & faithful.  The way she models unconditional love consistently points me to Jesus.  She loves & values people, a trait that I believe she has passed on & instilled into her children, which leads me to type the following...

I am a lover of all things family. I'm an advocate for the family.

The thing I'm realizing, is that at the core of my love for family, it's not so much about my family, rather about relationships. More then relationships, it's the essence of having a safe place to fall & to receive unconditional love, no matter what.

This love that is so deep within me, I truly believe was placed there the moment I was created. People crave relationships. I think of the movie "Cast Away" with Tom Hanks, he craved relationship so much he became friends with Wilson, a volleyball. There is no doubt in my mind that people were never created to be alone.

Personally, I could not be more thankful for my parents & siblings. Without a doubt my sister is my most trusted, best friend. My parents are one of the few safe places in my life that I can run to regardless of the situation I find myself in. My brother is always just a phone call or text away & although younger then me, has been my "protecter" since we were children.  The family I've married into is equally as important & valuable in my life.  I realize the relationships I have with my inlaws are precious & indeed rare.  My husband & I value our relationships with our family members above all others & desire to create a home where family is always a top priority.

I do realize however that not everyone has been as fortunate as I have in terms of biological parents & siblings. Unfortunately family as I know it is not the norm. This would explain the numerous people who have been in & out my life growing up, acting as "older siblings," as they were seeking a safe place like the home I grew up in.

And this is where one of the beautiful things about families comes in. Family can be created. If at the end of the day, a family is the people you feel most loved, accepted & safest with, then no DNA testing can define or determine your family.  However there is one key factor involved with family as I know it, & that is intergenerational relationships.

A little while ago I had the distinct joy & privilege of spending time with some extended family.  From my great aunt, to cousins the same age as my parents, plus a few cousins closer to my age, these three generations spent some precious moments together & were the envy of many around us.  Every once in awhile I need to pinch myself as I think of the reality in which I live.  I think one of my family's greatest assets is that we're inclusive, as all families should be.

They say that blood is thicker then water.  As it should be.  Family are the ones who stick closest through thick & thin.  Who support & encourage in all circumstances.  Family are the ones who display unconditional love in the most overwhelming ways that cannot begin to be described.

In the end, our family in whatever shape or form it comes will always be there & in turn, need us to be there for them.

Hope is hope

A few weeks ago I was talking with my mom on my way home.

{As a side note, first I would like to say how God certainly knew what He was doing putting me in the 21st Century! I can't imagine my life without the technology that I have at my finger tips. Everything from luxuries within my home like appliances, running water, central air etc., to my vehicle, my mobile phone, computers & the internet. I can't imagine having to heat water over a fire just for a warm bath, washing clothes by hand, or not having the means to communicate with those nearest & dearest to me where ever & whenever I like!}

Back to my conversation with my mom...this particular day we had both had full days. We both have jobs that require working closely with people & their emotions. My mom works at a high school & I work at church. Although we have very different job descriptions & employers, I think often times our jobs are very similar. That day was one of those days that was similar, yet very different

However, there is one detail which separates our jobs regardless of the situations, it's a little four letter word...H-O-P-E. The beauty of working in a church, is that I'm given the freedom to offer hope in every situation I face. Not only in my own approach to situations, but also in how & what I say. Working in a public school, my mom is confined to what she's able to share in situations, however, the tone she uses, her attitude &a actions are able to display hope in perhaps a more tangible way then my words ever could.

I'm fairly confident that the greatest gift you can offer someone in crisis is hope.  What more do we really want then the hope that things can change, that people will change, that sickness will be healed, that something better will come of an awful situation.  At the end of the day, it's hope that often gets us through those darkest moments in our lives.

The truth is, the packaging doesn't really matter.  Whether I'm offering hope through Bible verses & prayers, or my mom is offering hope through a calm tone & a positive attitude, the effects are the same.  Perhaps the situations my mom offers hope in are more difficult for something with a faith in God, as she needs to be a bit more creative in her approach, but at the end of the day hope is hope.

Since I am employed by a church, & as a result able to be "churchy" I leave you with this...
"we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us." (Romans 5:3-4)

Thankful

This past weekend Canadians celebrated Thanksgiving, a time set aside every year to thank God for everything we have.

Yesterday a beloved friend sent me a list of 365 things she's thankful for in 2011, which got me thinking. The following list isn't quite 365, not nearly 365 in fact, but here's a few things I was reminded to be thankful for over the course of this past weekend...

I spent Friday afternoon & evening with my lovely sister-in-law, her husband & their beautiful twin girls. I'm thankful to have the kind of relationship with my sister-in-law that I'm able to be apart of their lives on a regular basis. I love that I get to spend time with my lovely nieces & watch as each week they grow up just a little bit more.

Saturday I got to spend basically the whole day with my husband. I'm thankful for someone who's strong, caring, generous, kind, honest, gracious, supportive, understanding, patient, loving, encouraging, wise, smart, sexy...the list goes on. Not only is this man my life partner, he's also my best friend. He's the only one who knows absolutely everything about me & yet still loves me.

Sunday morning in church I was reminded to be thankful that I live in a country where there is freedom to worship my God.

Sunday we celebrated Thanksgiving with both our families. I'm thankful for my roots. My parents are incredible people who have been amazing parents. They've taught me about life & have instilled great values into me. My in-laws are such amazing people who love ms as their own daughter. They have done a fine job in raising my husband to be the man he is today. I couldn't be more thankful for these two families who have shaped my husband & I. We are a direct result of their love, persistence & God's grace. Our meal was delicious & filling. I'm thankful for the abundance of nourishment available to me.

The majority of Monday was spent in my home, which is located in a fabulous little cul-de-sac with fantastic neighbours. I'm happy for the shelter I'm lucky enough to dwell in. It's comfy, it's warm & it's safe. My neighbourhood if full of amazing friendly people, all of whom I know are looking out for us & we for them.

Truly this is just scrapping the surface. There is so much that I'm thankful for & although this list isn't 365 things long, I know without a doubt it could be...

Psalm 136:1

Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good. His love endures forever.

Partners

This past weekend I received a text message from an excited grandma, telling me that a grandson had asked Jesus into his heart the previous night with his mom. The part of the message that followed totally floored & humbled me, "Thanks for teaching him about Jesus."

Last night my husband & I were talking about this & both came to a unanimous agreement, it is far better for a child to make that amazing decision in the presence of their parents, rather then in our presence. Not that I don't love being able to watch children's faces as they begin a personal relationship Jesus, but there's something so special about this happening in the home...not the mention the fact that I believe that's the way God designed it.

"Write these commandments that I've given you today on your hearts. Get them inside of you and get them inside your children. Talks about them wherever you are, sitting at home or walking in the street; talk about them from the time you get up in the morning to when you fall into bed at night. Tie them on your hands and foreheads as a reminders; inscribe them on the doorposts of your homes and on your city gates: Deuteronomy 6:6-9

It is such a great honour & privilege to partner with parents & grandparents as they raise children who know & love God. And that's really what my job is all about, being a partner. As a children's pastor, my job isn't to be the main spiritual teacher in children's lives, that job has been plainly given to parents, but I'm so happy to be apart of the process; to start conversations, plant seeds, prompt questions.

At the end of the day, it's all about partnership.

Auntie Catherine

My husband's older sister gave birth to two beautiful baby girls on Friday, May 20 at 3:32pm & 3:38pm. They are the two newest, most beautiful additions to our family & although I have yet to meet these little bundles, I'm absolutely in love!

In fact, I've been in love from the moment the exciting news was shared that my sister-in-law was expecting. My love grew after the ultrasound, when it was announced that there were in fact two little babes growing inside. My love nearly overwhelmed me when I saw pictures from the ultrasound & was told that these two, were in fact fraternal twins & both little princesses. Every little girlie/petite/adorable outfit, fabulous accessory, cuddly stuffed animal that I've seen (& in quite a few cases purchased), my love for these little cuties has grown even more.

Working with children & families full time has allowed me to share in the excitement of many children who have entered the world. Although there are many babies who have been born that are so very dear to my heart, no one could have ever prepared me for the excitement, anticipation, and love that I have for my two nieces.

Knowing that these two little princesses will be a large part of our lives, that these little babes will one day be cousins/playmates etc. with my future children, that these adorable little ones will begin to shape what family get togethers/long weekends/Friday afternoons etc. look like makes my heart bubble over.

The words of Psalm 139 have been rolling around in my head, as I've had moments of remembering my parents speaking them over me throughout my life:

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."

The truth is that through this whole process I've been reminded of what an honour & privilege it is to invited to partner with parents as they raise incredible kids who love God. With my nieces it's only natural that the family come alongside to encourage & help support throughout the parenting process, which is turning out to be one of the greatest honours I've ever had. I'm realizing though, how amazing it is to essentially be invited into families, as another member, as I come alongside to support & encourage.

To the families that I've been invited into, thank you for giving me this amazing opportunity. I'm realizing more & more just how much of an incredible privilege this is. I wouldn't trade my job or role as Auntie Catherine for anything in the world!

meddling

I just finished reading Church+Home by Mark Holmen. He presents some excellent & challenging thoughts on Faith@Home, whichwould make sense seeing how he's the founder of the Faith@Home movement. This is his third book I've read, & all though they all seem to portray the same basic information, I'm still a huge fan.

One of the ideas that Mark presents is "meddling grandparents." He challenges & encourages grandparents to get involved in their children & grandchildren's faith walk, whether through writing letters/texts/email, making phone calls, & prayer. I love this...probably mostly because I have my own story of how my life has been effected by "meddling."

My great grandma Belsher was an incredible woman of faith. Although we did meet before she passed away, I can't say that I remember as I was still very young. Her legacy, however, lives on, not only in my life but in the lives of nearly all of my Belsher relatives. Great grandma prayed for each one of us every single day. I realize that many grandparents do this, but something to keep in mind is that she had 16 children who lives to adulthood! Praying for everyone in her family was no small feat. Once every three years the Belsher family gathers for a family reunion & it is tradition that on the Sunday of our reunion we have a church service. This was of course birthed & continues all because of great grandma.

I think the greatest way my great grandma has included my faith walk however, is a bit more specific to me. I was a bit of a "miracle baby" as I wasn't my parents first pregnancy. When my great grandma came to visit me as an infant she took me in her arms and said, "All children are a blessing from God, but this is a blessed child." Although I don't remember these words of life being spoken over me, my parents do. I'm fairly confident that now 20-something years later that those words have in fact made a huge impact in my life.

So, to all parents/grandparents/great grandparents out there, who are thinking it's too little too late to have any sort of impact on your children/grandchildren/great grandchildren's faith walk, I would like to encourage you to meddle. Send little notes of encouragement. Make regular phone calls. But most of all pray. You never know what seeds you've planted!

Mother's Day Prayer

Generally at DGC, following worship, offering & announcements the children are dismissed to head off to DGKids. Usually their dismissal is proceeded by a prayer of blessing over them, asking God to touch their lives. Yesterday, being Mother's Day, we did our dismissal a wee bit different. Rather then asking parents/grandparents etc. to lay hands on their children, I asked the children to lay hands on their moms/grandmas/aunts etc. and led them in the following "repeat after me" prayer:

Thank You Father,

For putting me

In the same family,

As this amazing woman.

I thank You

That she loves You

With all her heart,

And that she shows me

That love everyday.

Thank You

That she has determined

To help me

Learn more about You,

And for being an example

Of how to follow You.

May she be blessed

This morning,

As she continues

To worship

And learn more

About You.

We both love You so much!

In Jesus' Name we pray,

Amen.

It was something fun, a little bit different, but most importantly something to bring honour & blessing to the most fabulous women in our lives!

To the amazing women in my life:

To the women who support, encourage & empower me to be who I've been created to be, thank you! May you feel & know that there is a support system of people who believe in you & your potential, in your corner of the ring as well.

To the women who challenge my thinking, behaviour & character, thank you for not allowing me to become comfortable with where I am, but for challenging me to continue to grow & enlarge my territory. Know that the best is yet to come, and although you're perfect the way you are, there is more for you to accomplish.

To the women who allow me to cry my heart out, share my moments of joy & all the emotions in between, thank you for being a safe place. Know that whenever you need an ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on I am here for you.

To the women who go out of their way to generously give & lavish love upon me, thank you. May you feel that as you are a blessing to those around you that you are in turn being blessed more then you could ever imagine.

To the women who mother & care for me, thank you. Know that you are building something much larger then what you input into my life. The legacy you are building will continue to grow for generations to come.

To the women who come alongside & just do everyday life, thank you for being apart of the journey. I sincerely look forward the the many season ahead that we will get to share together.

To all the amazing women I have the distinct honour and privilege of knowing, Happy International Women's Day! Know that you are loved, cherished, valued & adored.

Love you to the moon & back.

xoxox

get it first

Legacy has been on my mind for the better part of this year. And I firmly believe that legacy must first be built in your own life before it can be built in the lives of others.

It's easy to have hopes and dreams of the legacy you wish to leave behind. The thing is, how can you pass something on if you don't posses it yourself?

For example: You want your future generations to love God with all their hearts, minds, souls, and strength. Before you can ever expect this legacy to be built in your children/grand children/great grand children's lives you must have it built in your own life. If you aren't modeling the relationship with God you hope your children will have, it's hard to expect them to have it themselves. If you aren't reading your Bible, praying, building the Church...how can you put expectations on your children to do that? You can't except your children to be or do something that you aren't being or doing yourself.

If you want your children to respect you and your spouse, guess what? You need to model respect towards your children and your spouse.

It's all about following the leader. So become the leader you want people to follow. Model the attributes and character traits you hope more people would have. Be honest, kind, respectful, loving, generous...

And when you are the person you hope those following behind you will become, you can be sure they'll just continue to built upon that which has been built for them. May your ceiling become the floor of the future generations. Set the ceiling high, and watch the building continue!