Who You Are Vs What You Do

Ok, we did it! My oldest is potty trained. At 3.5 years old and after many battle of the wills, she decided she was ready and that was that. To say that I didn't beat myself up on a regular basis over my child who is quite intelligent not being potty trained would be an understatement.  It was a daily battle not feeling like a failure every time I changed a Pull-Up.

Unfortunately, social media was no help. "Potty Train in 3 Days," let me tell you, I tried every trick, bribe, method and timing in the book. And, although I have some amazing mom's in my life who continually encouraged me, reminding me that her not using the potty isn't a direct reflection on my parenting, there were a few (whom I sincerely hope unintentionally) weren't so kind in their comments or looks.

What I learned through the potty training process with my daughter is that ultimately what matters most is who you are, not what you do. This is something my husband and I strive to teach and model for our children, that their character is far more important then their skill set. There have been countless times that my toddler's character shone through and made more proud than any poop or pee on a potty could.

The same goes for you, at the end of the day, many won't care or remember what you can do, but they will remember how you made them feel. Do you look someone in the eyes and actually listen to what they're saying? Are you generous, more than fiscally, with your time, your words, your actions? Are you kind? Are you patient?

There is definitely a time and a place to let you skill set shine and I believe we've been gifted with talents for a purpose; but perhaps we put too much emphasis on the talent sometimes? In the parenting world we love to show off our offsprings latest learned skill, ensuring they're reaching those crucial milestones. And yes, milestones should be celebrated and new skills practiced, as should the budding character of our wee ones.

If you're feeling pressed down and like you don't measure up because of something as trivial as potty training, let me remind you that who you are far outshines what you do and in the end it always will.

"You're doing a good job."

Recently I was out for dinner with my two daughters. As per usual my children were friendly & smiley towards those seated around us, including the table with a family that had two older girls. Following our meal, on the way out of the restaurant, the mom of the family with the daughters stopped me. She asked the ages of my children (3 & 1), commented on how busy I must be (in a knowing sort of way) & then complimented their behaviour throughout the meal.

The exchange of that evening got me thinking about how I interact with other parents, whether I know them or not. We’ve all been there, someone starts melting down in the middle of the store & everyone is all eyes. Some give the sympathetic look, portraying complete understanding of the situation. Others are judgemental, usually as they’ve never been in that situation themselves. Occasionally a passerby will offer the words, “this too shall pass.” But still there the desperate parent is, struggling to keep it together & help their child get it together.

The thing that stuck out to me about my interaction with the fellow girl mom following our mealtime out, was that she didn’t offer me some cliche phrase to make me feel guilty about not savouring these hectic, busy baby & toddler years, rather encouraged my children & more directly my parenting.

I can totally appreciate the sentiment of the phrase, “this too shall pass.” Parents of adult children never fail to let you know that “before you know it they’re grown,” & any parent knows this all too well. I mean, hello, where has the last year gone? Just like that I’m on the cusp of full on toddlerhood with my second child! The days may be long, but the years are certainly, very short. And although that short phrase, “this too shall pass,” is intended to offer some sort of hope, it still leaves a parent feeling desperate & in the moment, often like a failure.

I know that in those crazy moments when the sh*t is hitting the fan & meltdown mode is in full swing, it’s like a car crash; it’s so bad that you want to look away, but you just can’t. Imagine if rather than giving that awkward, knowing smile, or offering some cliche that offers little to no hope in that precise moment, if we simply said, “you’re doing a good job.”

I’ll be honest, I’m my own worst critic when it comes to parenting. There are countless times when I beat myself up as I drift to sleep about situations that I could have handled better, been more patient, spoke more softly, been more kind, been more engaged… What I need more than anything from those who have been there isn’t unsolicited advice (social media offers enough of that, thank you very much), or a catchphrase to make me feel guilty. What I need is someone who’s been there to identify that I am in fact doing the best that I can given the circumstances.

So the next time I witness a meltdown in the grocery store, knowing the self condemnation that accompanies your child losing it, I’ll be the first offer the phrase, “you’re doing a good job,” because really, aren’t we all just hungry for validation? Parenthood is hard enough on it’s own with sleepless nights, endless laundry, mealtime mishaps & feeding struggles, playtime struggles, the witching hour, chaotic bath & bedtimes, potty training, explosive poos, meltdown moments, figuring out childcare etc. etc. etc. What we really need from other parents is a cheer squad. Unless asked, I won’t offer advice, just encouragement. 

Goodness knows we all need.

I was evacuated.

There's nothing like an evacuation to put life into perspective. Thankfully I was home from work as the small town I live in was being evacuated. Frantically I went through our home of three years gathering what would be needed in the event that our house ended up in flames.

While gathering important papers, passports & photos I began to get a greater perspective on what's truly of value. I'm so thankful that my parents were able to come assist me. My mom helped me get a handle on what's irreplaceable as she began packing up pieces from my husband's grandma & china pieces that have been passed down through generations, plus precious quilts handmade by my maternal grandma.

Leaving my home gave me a new understanding of what it would feel like to live in a developing nation. As I looked ahead & saw nothing but a steady stream of traffic & in my rear view mirrors just as many vehicles following. Imagining what it would be like to be making that trek away from my home on foot brought all sorts of emotions to the surface. I could not have been more thankful to have a vehicle to assist with my quick evacuation; my Jeep, is something that I so often take for granted & yet after a day like yesterday, I was so appreciative of the four wheels that transported me to safety.

My mom & I headed out of town at the same time, while my dad was a bit behind as he went to rescue our trailer. The only thing is that he wasn't just "a bit" behind, we didn't see him for more then five hours. Did I mention he didn't have a cell phone on him? What was supposed to be a quick trip, ended up being an evening full of praying & fried nerves. Turns out my dad was stuck in traffic, thankfully that's all that had happened.

Although I had our family heirlooms, all important documents & our wedding photos, I realize that the most important thing in my life, isn't a thing. The most important thing in my life is without a doubt the relationships I have with my nearest & dearest. I know that that sounds incredibly cliche, but it couldn't be more true after the past 24 hours I've experienced.

Last night I was incredibly displaced with only a suitcase that I threw a few clothing items in (no shoes I might add, shocking, I know!), a laundry basket with items wrapped in tea towels & a backseat full of important papers & photos. To be honest, I'm still emotionally raw. I could not be more thankful for the many men & women who have worked so hard to keep homes & lives safe. I could not be more thankful to my incredible brother-in-law who was out digging trenches, one of the many unsung heros of Southern Alberta; someone who certainly never signed up to fight fires.

Finally my heart is bursting at the seams that my family is safe. Words can't even begin to describe how thankful & grateful I am at the moment. The words "His mercies are new every morning," have never felt more true in my life then they did today.

About my mom & family

With Mother's Day having just passed, I've been quite reflective the past little while about how incredible my mom is.  Those closest to her & who know her well, know that her life has certainly had it's share of difficult situations & yet, she is strong & could easily be defined as an overcomer.  My mom is beautiful to the core & her beauty from within radiates outwards.  Her identity is defined not by what she does, rather by who she is & by who has created her.  She is without a doubt supportive, encouraging, passionate & faithful.  The way she models unconditional love consistently points me to Jesus.  She loves & values people, a trait that I believe she has passed on & instilled into her children, which leads me to type the following...

I am a lover of all things family. I'm an advocate for the family.

The thing I'm realizing, is that at the core of my love for family, it's not so much about my family, rather about relationships. More then relationships, it's the essence of having a safe place to fall & to receive unconditional love, no matter what.

This love that is so deep within me, I truly believe was placed there the moment I was created. People crave relationships. I think of the movie "Cast Away" with Tom Hanks, he craved relationship so much he became friends with Wilson, a volleyball. There is no doubt in my mind that people were never created to be alone.

Personally, I could not be more thankful for my parents & siblings. Without a doubt my sister is my most trusted, best friend. My parents are one of the few safe places in my life that I can run to regardless of the situation I find myself in. My brother is always just a phone call or text away & although younger then me, has been my "protecter" since we were children.  The family I've married into is equally as important & valuable in my life.  I realize the relationships I have with my inlaws are precious & indeed rare.  My husband & I value our relationships with our family members above all others & desire to create a home where family is always a top priority.

I do realize however that not everyone has been as fortunate as I have in terms of biological parents & siblings. Unfortunately family as I know it is not the norm. This would explain the numerous people who have been in & out my life growing up, acting as "older siblings," as they were seeking a safe place like the home I grew up in.

And this is where one of the beautiful things about families comes in. Family can be created. If at the end of the day, a family is the people you feel most loved, accepted & safest with, then no DNA testing can define or determine your family.  However there is one key factor involved with family as I know it, & that is intergenerational relationships.

A little while ago I had the distinct joy & privilege of spending time with some extended family.  From my great aunt, to cousins the same age as my parents, plus a few cousins closer to my age, these three generations spent some precious moments together & were the envy of many around us.  Every once in awhile I need to pinch myself as I think of the reality in which I live.  I think one of my family's greatest assets is that we're inclusive, as all families should be.

They say that blood is thicker then water.  As it should be.  Family are the ones who stick closest through thick & thin.  Who support & encourage in all circumstances.  Family are the ones who display unconditional love in the most overwhelming ways that cannot begin to be described.

In the end, our family in whatever shape or form it comes will always be there & in turn, need us to be there for them.

Partners

This past weekend I received a text message from an excited grandma, telling me that a grandson had asked Jesus into his heart the previous night with his mom. The part of the message that followed totally floored & humbled me, "Thanks for teaching him about Jesus."

Last night my husband & I were talking about this & both came to a unanimous agreement, it is far better for a child to make that amazing decision in the presence of their parents, rather then in our presence. Not that I don't love being able to watch children's faces as they begin a personal relationship Jesus, but there's something so special about this happening in the home...not the mention the fact that I believe that's the way God designed it.

"Write these commandments that I've given you today on your hearts. Get them inside of you and get them inside your children. Talks about them wherever you are, sitting at home or walking in the street; talk about them from the time you get up in the morning to when you fall into bed at night. Tie them on your hands and foreheads as a reminders; inscribe them on the doorposts of your homes and on your city gates: Deuteronomy 6:6-9

It is such a great honour & privilege to partner with parents & grandparents as they raise children who know & love God. And that's really what my job is all about, being a partner. As a children's pastor, my job isn't to be the main spiritual teacher in children's lives, that job has been plainly given to parents, but I'm so happy to be apart of the process; to start conversations, plant seeds, prompt questions.

At the end of the day, it's all about partnership.

Auntie Catherine

My husband's older sister gave birth to two beautiful baby girls on Friday, May 20 at 3:32pm & 3:38pm. They are the two newest, most beautiful additions to our family & although I have yet to meet these little bundles, I'm absolutely in love!

In fact, I've been in love from the moment the exciting news was shared that my sister-in-law was expecting. My love grew after the ultrasound, when it was announced that there were in fact two little babes growing inside. My love nearly overwhelmed me when I saw pictures from the ultrasound & was told that these two, were in fact fraternal twins & both little princesses. Every little girlie/petite/adorable outfit, fabulous accessory, cuddly stuffed animal that I've seen (& in quite a few cases purchased), my love for these little cuties has grown even more.

Working with children & families full time has allowed me to share in the excitement of many children who have entered the world. Although there are many babies who have been born that are so very dear to my heart, no one could have ever prepared me for the excitement, anticipation, and love that I have for my two nieces.

Knowing that these two little princesses will be a large part of our lives, that these little babes will one day be cousins/playmates etc. with my future children, that these adorable little ones will begin to shape what family get togethers/long weekends/Friday afternoons etc. look like makes my heart bubble over.

The words of Psalm 139 have been rolling around in my head, as I've had moments of remembering my parents speaking them over me throughout my life:

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."

The truth is that through this whole process I've been reminded of what an honour & privilege it is to invited to partner with parents as they raise incredible kids who love God. With my nieces it's only natural that the family come alongside to encourage & help support throughout the parenting process, which is turning out to be one of the greatest honours I've ever had. I'm realizing though, how amazing it is to essentially be invited into families, as another member, as I come alongside to support & encourage.

To the families that I've been invited into, thank you for giving me this amazing opportunity. I'm realizing more & more just how much of an incredible privilege this is. I wouldn't trade my job or role as Auntie Catherine for anything in the world!

Wall of Fame

I have a cork/bulletin board in my office that hangs on the wall next to my desk. It's littered with notes, pictures, homemade jewelry, drawings & crafts...all little reminds of the incredible little ones in my life. This board is so full that artwork has spilled over to walls, held in place with sticky tack & push pins.

Although I feel so honoured & loved by these gifts which decorate my walls, sometimes I can't help but wonder who feels more loved. The kids who cry when they have to leave church on Sunday, who invite me to their birthday parties, who beg for an invitation to come to my house, to have my babysit, or to have a sleepover in my trailer while camping, who grow up a bit & begin to invite me to band concerts, sporting events & ask for permission to use my name on resumes...who feels more loved?

For as much as I'm assuming the precious children in my life must feel loved to want to give me gifts & invite me to be apart of their everyday lives, I'm the one who feels more loved then I can express. It's overwhelming for me to look around my office, to read text messages & comments on Facebook. For as much as my Wall of Fame may show how loved those in my world feel, it proves to me how loved I am. Truly, I'm the one who's really blessed.

To the amazing women in my life:

To the women who support, encourage & empower me to be who I've been created to be, thank you! May you feel & know that there is a support system of people who believe in you & your potential, in your corner of the ring as well.

To the women who challenge my thinking, behaviour & character, thank you for not allowing me to become comfortable with where I am, but for challenging me to continue to grow & enlarge my territory. Know that the best is yet to come, and although you're perfect the way you are, there is more for you to accomplish.

To the women who allow me to cry my heart out, share my moments of joy & all the emotions in between, thank you for being a safe place. Know that whenever you need an ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on I am here for you.

To the women who go out of their way to generously give & lavish love upon me, thank you. May you feel that as you are a blessing to those around you that you are in turn being blessed more then you could ever imagine.

To the women who mother & care for me, thank you. Know that you are building something much larger then what you input into my life. The legacy you are building will continue to grow for generations to come.

To the women who come alongside & just do everyday life, thank you for being apart of the journey. I sincerely look forward the the many season ahead that we will get to share together.

To all the amazing women I have the distinct honour and privilege of knowing, Happy International Women's Day! Know that you are loved, cherished, valued & adored.

Love you to the moon & back.

xoxox

reason 1096743845

Yesterday evening I got a text from a guy who's in grade 7, and part of my "dream team" at DGKids. I've had the privilege of watching this student grow from a young boy in elementary, to now a fabulous young man with incredible leadership skills.

It's not out of the ordinary for him to text myself or husband, as we have quite the relationship with him although yesterday's text message was slightly different. Normally our texting will begin with either my husband and I sending a quick message asking how his day is going after feeling a bit of "nudge" to do so. But yesterday he was the one who initiated the texting. Why? Because he had exciting news to share!!!

Romans 12:15a states: "Rejoice with those who rejoice..." and I'm pretty sure that's why he sent me the message in the first place! Knowing that Matt & I would definitely without a doubt rejoice with him.

And that is just another reason why I love what I do!

Laurel Place

I've come to realize that I'm quite passionate about community. It's something that I crave and that I fight to maintain.

The cul-de-sac that my husband I live in, is one of the large reasons why I would like to never move. It has nothing to do with our house (although I REALLY love my home), it has nothing to do with the location (although the location is perfect for us at this stage in our lives), it's more about the other families who are our neighbors.

Over the past year, some of our neighbors have become our closest friends. It's not unusual for us to spent at least one afternoon/evening during the week with one of our neighbors. We've celebrated births, birthday's, we've helped landscape, done snow removal, played games, shared meals...the list goes on and on.

There's one particular family in our cul-de-sac that we don't see very often. With our different schedules it seems often the only times we ever connect is a quick wave as one is pulling into the driveway and the other pulls out. However, over the weekend this couple mentioned to us how sad they will be when/if they move, as they have never felt so loved and accepted by their neighbors! SERIOUSLY! We hardly ever see them, let alone spend anytime with them.

I've come to conclusion that building community doesn't mean that you have to be best friends. You don't have to spend loads of time together, or know ever detail about someone's life. You merely have to take the time to wave, to shout "hello" across the street, to shovel the sidewalk that connects the houses.

It's really not rocket science, and it certainly doesn't take much effort.

I love Laurel Place, and even now as it seems some changes will happen as new houses are built, and some original owners move on, I know that I will continue to love it. We're not only neighbors, we're friends. The bar for our community has already been set.

good genes

This week has been abnormally busy. And by busy I mean absolutely crazy!

I'm one lucky girl because even though its been outrageous in my life, I have one amazing, super supportive, always encouraging, best cheerleader on the planet husband (and he's hot, which is an added bonus), not to mention the fact that I live in the same city as my incredible parents who go out of their way to help others.

Case in point, my brother goes to a college where he's involved with the men's volleyball team. This weekend his team will be playing the college in my city. Pretty sweet as it means a chance to see my brother. Earlier this week my brother texted my mum saying that they were having trouble finding a hotel to stay in over the weekend. So naturally (although unnatural to others) she offered to let the team stay at their place. Keep in mind this is 15-ish, 6 foot-something, athletic men.

The main reason this comes so naturally to my mum is that my grandparents (her parents) were the same - opened their home. There was always an extra seat at the table, and more then enough food for whoever happened to stop by. Although I don't remember my great grandma, I can only imagine that she was the same. I'm convinced that this gift of hospitality has been passed on from generation, to generation - it has to be genetic.

In saying that, on Thursday evening, the men's volleyball team will be at my parents house, and the ladies...at mine.

And for this I'm truly thankful! Will it be crazy? Likely. Will it be exhausting? I'm sure. Will it be a blessing to the 15-ish people who enter my home? I certainly hope so.

My prayer is that those at my home, would leave the same as those who stay at my parents...well taken care of, physically and spiritually/emotionally.

a privilege and responsibility

The Fall of 2009 has been unlike any other I've ever experienced. It's been a very full mix of joys and sorrows. The interesting thing about this extreme mix of emotions is that nothing has happened to "me" directly. The ups and downs that I've been through have been those of others that I've had the privilege, and in some cases the responsibility to walk with them through.

I've been reminded time and time again of Paul's words, "Laugh with your happy friends when they're happy; share tears when they're down." (Romans 12:15 The Message) I'm a bit of a softy. It generally doesn't take much for me to get teary. On the other hand, it doesn't take much to get me laughing either. I'm generally not one to hide my emotions. It's not hard for me to identify with Paul's words.

This is one of my greatest strengths, and one of my greatest weaknesses.
A week ago, I was having a roast beef dinner with a few other people. Someone at the table started choking. Thankfully, this individual was able to get the piece of food out of their throat before the Heimlich maneuver was needed. Following this event, I was on the verge of tears for nearly the whole meal. To say that I was emotional and shook up would be an understatement (and I wasn't even the person who choked!). The poor person who was choking seriously started to question my first aid abilities as I could barely hold it together. This was definitely a point of weakness.

On the other hand, a close friend of mine is dealing with a family situation that involves cancer. Yesterday I had absolutely not problem weeping when I found out, and then again as I spoke with them on the phone. I've also spent many times rejoicing with this individual.

Because I work at a church occasionally it is my responsibility to "Laugh with your happy friends when they're happy; share tears when they're down."

But more then that I feel it is a privilege to walk with those in my life through their joys and sorrows.

blessed to be a blessing

This week (among many other things) I'm busy preparing for Defining Moments (Thursday, September 24th at 7:00pm at 236 Fairway Drive, Coaldale). For me part of that preparation includes gathering a few giveaways for the incredible women who will be in attendance.

While brainstorming what fabulous gifts I could collect, I had an extremely convicting thought (a Defining Moment of my own, if you will). I live in a country where I enjoy many freedoms and luxuries that women (and men) in other places around the world only dream about. These days, those of us living in developed countries have more then enough opportunities to help those in developing countries, whether it be through organizations where we can sponsor children or give funds to others in need, or through stores like Ten Thousand Villages where profits go back to those who worked to provide that product.

And so, as I begin to gather gifts for the women coming to Defining Moments, know that I'm having my own Defining Moment. I resolve to only purchase gifts that will not only be a blessing to someone in attendance, but also to a beautiful individual somewhere else on the planet.

The truth is that I'm incredibly blessed on so many levels. The least I can do is be a blessing...on so many levels.

open door policy

My husband and I moved into our first home earlier this year. This house has quite a bit of special meaning to us as we built it and we were able to put our own special touches in it. From picking out the floor plan and all the hardware, to the appliances and paint colors, this house is very dear to my heart.

This past weekend we had the privilege to host some of my husband's family in our home between my sister-in-law's wedding ceremony and reception. My husband comes from a culture where it is important to "pay it forward". Whether that means reciprocating a wedding gift, or hosting someone in your house after they have hosted you. For my husband having everyone over to our house was important culturally, but more then that it was important to us because we have been taught hospitality from childhood.

Where other people would look at us and think that having 15+ people over would be loads of work and huge strain, we look at it as an opportunity to use our house for what it was actually built for...a place of comfort, a haven, a shelter...a home.

People often comment on how my parents (and my in-laws) have the gift of hospitality. Personally I'm not sure its a gift, rather a lifestyle...a choice that both our parents decided to make. As a result we have an "open door policy" in our own home, since being hospitable is essentially part of our DNA.

In the entry way to our house we have a saying on our wall beneath our welcome sign..."Happy is the home that shelters a friend." We both know this to be true as we grew up in homes where friends were always sheltered and happiness was always in abundance.

Our prayer as we were in the building process was that our home would not only be "ours" but a "home to many." We are now seeing the reprocusions of our prayers...and we're loving every moment of it!

wherever, whenever, however

One of my (many) passions is family. I grew up in a home where family was a priority. When my husband and I went through pre-marital counseling together, one of the exercises we were asked to do as a questionnaire on our family, from which our families were then plotted on a grid. My family came up as abnormally close...no surprises there. As a whole, I get along quite well with my siblings, and I'm very close with my parents.

I'm a huge advocate of family meals. Growing up, often the deepest and most meaningful conversations happened around the table over a meal. There were many laughs shared around my parents dining room table, and also many tears. Supper was never to be missed by anyone! My husband has a demanding job, in which he often is needed to put in overtime hours. When we join my family for dinner (unless ABSOLUTELY necessary), we all wait for my husband to join us before we begin eating. It's just the way things work in my parents home.

However, I do remember a time in my life when meals were on the go...Tuesday's during my jr. high years were the manic days in our home. Tuesday was the day that we had music lessons, among other commitments. I can remember bolting from the school when the bell rang, signifying the end of another day, and hoping into my mum's van where my bag full of piano books was already waiting. We'd drive to the opposite side of the city for my piano lessons, and from there I often didn't see my siblings until 9:00pm that evening as we all had various activities we needed to be at.

But before anyone was dropped off after school we ALWAYS hit the McDonald's drive-thru for McFlurry's. And as we downed our McFlurry's on the way from point A to point B conversations flowed. We'd catch up on our days, on the challenges we faced, and everything we'd accomplished.

I look back on this time, and although I'm sure Tuesday's were the day my mum dreaded, for me the were often the highlight of my week. The point is, often times life gets in the way of the dinner table...and although I definitely believe that time spent together over a meal should never be replaced, sometimes you just need to make do with what you have. For my family, that meant staying a family even as we dined on drive-thru from McDonald's.

Life is busy. So go with the flow, create strong relationships with your family, wherever, whenever & however it may look for the season of life you find yourself in.

the fingers pointing back at me.

I recently engaged in a bit of a debate on facebook. I'm normally not one to get involved in heated discussions (EVER), but a comment made triggered something within me that I can't contain.

I think it's quite easy as humans to point the finger at the person next to us. It seems there's always someone who's done something "worse," and therefore leaves us feeling slightly justified in our own sins.

As a believer is I find this even more prevalent in the church as we look at those who aren't apart of our "elite country club" and can not only point one finger, but many. Not to mention other believers who sin as well...
tsk, tsk, tsk.

The problem ultimately, is that God does not rate sin. In His eyes, it's all equally bad.

I'm often reminded of the story in John 8 where the Pharisees bring the woman caught in adultery to Jesus.
"Teacher, this woman was caught having sex with a man who was not her husband. In the Law, Moses commanded us to kill such women by throwing stones at them. Now what do you say?" (John 8:4-5 NIRV)
And Jesus, being in the incredible man that He is bends down and writes in the sand with his finger. As the Pharisees continue to question Him, he stands up and replies,
"Has any one of you not sinned? Then you be the first to throw as stone at her." (John 8:7 NIRV)
Jesus bends back down and continues to write in the sand. And eventually of course everyone leaves.

The woman may not have been stoned, but every time I read this I feel as though I catch a stone right in my gut. So often I look at those around me and can't help but to judge, and compare their sin to mine. How wrong!

You know that saying about how every time you point your finger at someone there are three fingers pointing back at you? Who am I to judge others sins when I gossip? lie? covet? ...

I do however believe that as believers we should be keeping one another accountable for our actions, words and thoughts...but, I also believe that there should be relationship in place before you start keeping someone accountable. And please, let accountability be as far as it goes. Let God be the one to deal with issues - He's the ONLY one who can bring the conviction to change a life and a heart.

love letters from God

I'm in the process of recovering from "one of those" weekends.
After MANY hours of preparation and a weekend of full on ministry plus little sleep, I found myself completely exhausted on Monday. Monday evening was spent with my connect group, which was refreshing as always, but ended up being even more amazing then usual...

Our connect group is busy planning and scheming for taking over the Sunday morning service on July 12th (if you're going to be in Lethbridge you should come check it out!). Unfortunately one of the couples in our community will be away on holidays that week, yet was still at our meeting on Monday...for a God appointed reason I'm convinced! Following our meeting of planning this one individual felt she needed to pray for me...and she totally "read my mail."

Have you ever had a moment when you're feeling totally overwhelmed and completely underpowered, and then out of NO WHERE comes something resembling a love letter from your Creator?

That is exactly what I experienced Monday night. Words cannot express how incredible it was to receive exactly what I needed in that moment.

There were many things that happened over the weekend that have remained unheard by many, and yet this one woman seemed to speak into every situation I had faced over the three days prior.

I LOVE how God knows everything we need. Whether its a word of encouragement or confirmation, a hug, a smile, a rest...and somehow He always provides in unsuspecting ways.

Whatever situation you find yourself in...receive the love letters God is sending to you.

dedicated.

This past Sunday, my friends dedicated their little man at church. When these type of things happen I tend to get a bit teary. Truth be known I'm generally a fairly emotional person, but more then that, it moves me to see parents making a commitment to God as they raise their children to be the amazing men and women they've been created to be. What an incredible responsibility and honour for parents!!!

Following the dedication of my friends little guy things only got more emotional...for me.
The time came in the service for the children to be dismissed, and so I took the microphone and began to pray for them...and during my prayer became overwhelmed by emotion...

You see, just as my friends dedicated their son (and themselves!), every mum and dad in that place did that same thing on Sunday morning. Although there wasn't the certificate, and blessing to go along with it, they had made the same commitment just by being there.

And this thought overwhelmed me!

And it continues to overwhelm me!

I think it's easy to go through with the "ceremony" of dedication. It's easy to stand up on stage, to answer yes, and to have your precious little one prayed over and blessed. It's hard when you've been running around crazy all weekend, and yet still get up early on Sunday morning to be at church. It's hard when the world screams for your attention, and yet you choose to raise your children to love and know their creator.

That's what it really means to have your child dedicated - it's more then a church service with your baby, it's more then a certificate. It's doing the hard stuff and doing it the best you can.

That's where my passion comes in,
that's where the tears come from.

And so I once again dedicated myself on Sunday, to being a support to the parents who have dedicated themselves and their children.

the way it should be.

Matt and I have the huge privilege of having a good relationship with our neighbors. I realize this is a privilege because I know that on many streets neighbors don't even know each others names, let alone what's happening in their lives.

We have neighbors who recently invited a baby girl into their lives and home. The day after she was born from across the street our neighbor yelled, "Matt, I'm a father of two! We had a baby girl! You and Catherine need to come over for a drink to celebrate with us!"

Unfortunately that drink has yet to happen since the past few weeks have been complete craziness and Matt and I have had hardly anytime together, let alone catching up with friends and family.
Today, as Matt was leaving for work so was our neighbor. Matt apologized that we still hadn't been over to see the new babe, which has turned out to be ok since there have been oodles of family and friends visiting since mum and bub got home. Matt also said that with since there's less visitors around we would love to help with a meal, or in any other way needed. In reply our neighbor said, "no! No food! We have so much food from people!"

Wow.

And in my opinion that's the way things should be. When there's a need, family, friends, community should be filling it - over and above.

a fabulous parntership

As someone who's involved with children, I realize the amazing partnership between parents and childcare workers.

I remember an incident that happened while I was in grade six when I saw this partnership in action.
There was a student in another grade six class who would bring Tylenol with her to school and distribute it to other students during recess. The students who took the Tylenol didn't have any aches or pains, they took the Tylenol just for the sake of it.
A bit confused (I had trouble swallowing pills as a young girl), I talked to my mum about these strange occurrences in my life.
As a concerned parent my mum naturally (or maybe not so naturally) contacted the school so that the grade six teachers were aware of what was going on in the playground.
Within a few days all the grade sixes were crammed into a room with the school nurse who proceeded to tell us about the dangers of taking medication; when its needed, when its not needed, possible side affects etc.
Soon after this meeting the 'Tylenol dealing' came to an end.

A little while ago my husband and I had a run in with a young man who was telling us about watching inappropriate movies for someone his age (or any age in my personal opinion). At first we were both uncomfortable with how to deal with this; were his parents allowing him to watch these films? Should we ask at the risk of seeming judgmental, or would our concern be welcome?
Thankfully this mother came to us asking if her son had mentioned anything. We then proceeded to say that he had. It came as such a relief to her to know that we were concerned as well. We continued to come with a plan on how to discourage this young man for watching these shows in a diplomatic, yet very serious manner.

I think often parents feel their alone in educating their children how to be 'street wise,' which is quite unfortunate because of all the resources available through schools and other places where extra-curricular activities happen.

Let it be known that I personally believe in these partnerships as I have seen a very positive outcome. If you are a parent I would encourage you to spend time voicing your concerns to your children's teachers/childcare workers etc. Together the two are capable of shaping incredible young people.